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Ask him to solve a complex math problem. He will. Ask him to figure out what happens #WhenAWomanShops and you will have him on his knees. That's the plight of Martians - a fairly intelligent breed of humans, who are adept at building satellites but completely clueless about how Venusians play this game of shopping. Don't believe us? Just promise anonymity to any Martian and he will confess that the biggest mysteries on Earth boil down to these seven questions. Read on and tell us if you agree!
1. When you ask 'How do I look in this dress?' What do you exactly want to hear?
The moment a woman walks out of the trial room our man knows he is in trouble. If he keeps his hand on his heart and tells the truth, he knows what's going to happen. And if he tells that dress actually looks nice, he knows, she won't buy it.
2. When you say 'I am not buying', then why are you trying?
Martian's brains tend to hang – very much like a dated PC, when their partners go shopping for scarves and spend hours looking for shoes. For men, shopping is like football. There's only one place to go– the goalpost. But Venusians have a point, what if you are looking for scarves and you miss a good deal on shoes? Have a point. Don't they?
3. When you know heels are uncomfortable, why do you still wear them?
For men, the art of dressing well is the art of being comfortable and looking good. But #WhenAWomanShops, the art of dressing well is the ability to spend hours, she takes pain to look good. Somehow, a man never understands this. Because he always wants to take the easiest way to look good.
4. If you can't fit into your old jeans, why do you still keep it?
He knows at least three diet plans that haven't worked. And he knows that the old skinny cut, fits her only in the mind. So why can't she be an angel and just donate it? His POV is that even if planet Earth becomes lighter, she is not going to wear the old jeans and change her wardrobe completely. This is where his partner reminds him that old jeans is not just jeans, it's a slam-book of nostalgia and emotion.
5. A sale is supposed to help you spend less. So why do you spend more?
Most men have an accountant's brain. They argue that if you want to save more, you must spend less. But women have a stronger point – they believe that if you want to reap profits tomorrow, you must invest today. If there's a family wedding in six months, make best use of the sale today and save money. Think beyond your credit card billing cycle!
6.If pink is your favourite colour, why can't you have 3 pink dresses?
When it comes to the dictum of colour, the simple Martian believes that the more you like it, the more you must have it. While his Venusian partner differs, she says the more you like it, the more variations of it you must have. This leaves our friend a little confused over the age-old idiom – God is in the details.
7. When I buy you a gift, why do you always exchange it?
Every man has had this feeling of his heart being cut into fine cubes. He cautiously treads into the women's section, and lovingly selects a military green top or a polka-dotted business suit. And in exactly 0.01 seconds she decides to change it. Well, the mantra is simple. Our tastes don't match. So just spend. Don't choose.
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