| How, Alan Turing thought, does the soft-walled, jellied, symmetrical cell become the asymmetrical horse? It was just before dusk, the sun’s last shafts doubling the fence posts, all the dark mares on their dark shadows. It was just after Schrodinger’s What is Life, not long before Watson, Franklin, Crick, not long before supper. How does a chemical soup, he asked, give rise to a biological pattern? And how does a pattern shift, an outer ear gradually slough its fur, or a shorebird’s stubby beak sharpen toward the trout? He was halfway between the War’s last enigmas and the cyanide apple—two bites— that would kill him. Halfway along the taut wires that hummed between crime and pardon, indecency and privacy. How do solutions, chemical, personal, stable, unstable, harden into shapes? And how do shapes break? What slips a micro-fissure across a lightless cell, until time and matter double their easy bickering? God? Chance? A chemical shudder? He was happy and not, tired and not, humming a bit with the fence wires. How does a germ split to a self? And what is a—We are not our acts and remembrances, Schrodinger wrote. Should something— God, chance, a chemical shudder?— sever us from all we have been, still it would not kill us. It was just before dusk, his segment of earth slowly ticking toward night. Like time, he thought, we are almost erased by rotation, as the dark, symmetrical planet lifts its asymmetrical cargo up to the sunset: horses, ryegrass— In no case, then, is there a loss of personal existence to deplore— marten, whitethroat, blackbird, lark—nor will there ever be. Copyright © 2016 Linda Bierds. Used with permission of the author. |
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