[AffirmationstoDe-Stress] \MORNING COFFEE

"Before you decide, review your values." We all have wants, needs and desires. These feelings indicate what we value most. But, sometimes, wants, needs and desires come into conflict, and we must decide where to invest our time and attention. No one can do everything at once. So, when a conflict arises, take the time to think about your long-term values before you make a decision about where to focus your energy. Remember, when you focus on one thing, you often must let go of another (at least for the time being). Ultimately, you must go with the decision that supports your highest values, and will make you happiest, both now and in the future. But, don't delay. Fulfillment and joy await you, after a decision is made. ©Jane Powell     Free Yourself from People Pleasing   "Give yourself permission to say, 'No.'"   As young girls, many of us were taught to always try to please people. We were told it was important to be seen as nice and non-confrontational. As a result, we went out of our way to do things that people wanted. We became people pleasers, afraid to rock the boat.   Is this still your mantra?   Recognize and appreciate that you have a right to do what's right for you. There is no need to always feel obligated to please others, at your expense.   If a friend asks you do something when you have other priorities, say "No." If the school asks you to volunteer when you'd rather enjoy lunch with friends, say "No."   Don't feel obligated to offer an excuse. Give yourself permission to say, "No!" Because a balanced life includes pleasing yourself, as well as others.     Leave the stress behind Much of what is stressful to you is what you've decided is stressful. What if you decided differently? Feeling stressed in certain situations, or with certain tasks, or with certain people, is not a foregone conclusion. Rather, it's a way you choose to respond. Sure, many things in life will challenge you greatly. Yet instead of letting those challenges get to you and make you stressful, you can choose a more powerful, effective response. Instead of seeing yourself as fighting against the challenges, you can see yourself as thriving on them, and even enjoying them. Even when people and situations are extremely difficult, you can find great fulfillment in calmly working through them. You can let others be stressed and angry and frustrated. All the while, you can choose to be peaceful and productive. Life's difficulties don't have to bring you down, because you have what it takes to lovingly and purposefully deal with them. Choose to respond with a positive perspective, and leave the stress behind.  Ralph Marston

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