[Fropki] Dirty Jokes as Laughter Medicine

Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they're dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms.

 

The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he's unable to reach a certain physical state that would enable him to join with his date. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of ONE, TWO,

 

THREE...HUH! all night long.

 

In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, How did it go? The first whispers back: It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't get an erection. The second dwarf shook his head. You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the bed!

 

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A man and woman were dating and he asked her to marry him. She told him to prove his love to her she wanted him to get her name, Wendy, tattooed on his penis. When it was erect is said Wendy and when it was limp if said Wy. They got married and went to Jamaica to a nude beach for their honeymoon. Wendy told her husband to go get them a drink so he went to a stand on the beach and noticed the man who was waiting on him also has a Wy on his penis. He said oh you must have a wife named Wendy to and the waiter said no mine says Welcome to Jamaica man have a nice day!!!

 

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A husband and his wife who have been married 20 years were doing some yard work. The man was working hard cleaning the BBQ grill while his wife was bending over, weeding flowers from the flower bed. So the man says to his wife "Your rear end is almost as wide as this grill" She ignores the remark.

 

A little later, the husband takes his measuring tape and measures the grill, then he goes over to his wife while she is bending over, measures her rear end and gasps, "Geez, it really IS as wide as the grill!" She ignores this remark as well.

 

Later that night while in bed, her husband starts to feel frisky. The wife calmly responds, "If you think I'm gonna fire up the grill for one little wiener, you are sadly mistaken."

 

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A couple decided to go to Alaska for a romantic weekend. When they got to the cabin it was cold so the wife asked her husband to go chop some wood for that fire place. He came in after 5 minutes and told his wife that his hands were cold, so she said her put your hands between my thighs to warm them. So he did and went back outside to finish chopping wood. He came in after another 5 minutes and said " honey my hands are cold again". So she tells him here put your hands between my thighs to warm them. So he did and then he went back out to chop some more wood. 5 minutes has passed and he went in again and said, "honey my hands are cold again". She then said, " Damn don't your ears ever get cold?"

 

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A guy walks into a bar and orders 12 tequilas. The bartender asked, "what's wrong," and the guy says that he just found out that his younger son is gay. The bartender says, "he's sorry about it." After a couple of days the guy comes back and orders 15 tequilas. The bartender asked, "What's wrong now," to which the guy responds That he found out that his older son was gay, too. The bartender says that he's sorry. The guy returned a few days later and ordered 20 tequilas. The bartender burst out, "Isn't anyone in your family gettin' any pussy?!" The guy gets really pissed and says, "Yeah, my wife!!!!!"

 

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Woman rushes into her house one morning and yells to her husband,
 "Sam, pack up your stuff. I just won the lottery!"
 "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?"
 "Whatever. Just so you're out of the house by noon!"

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