at 93, you determined to pick up and go— and stay gone. the job nkrumah called you to, to create, at last, your encyclopedia africana (encompassing a continent chipped like wood beneath an axe, a large enough diaspora to girdle the globe, and a mere four thousand years) was either well-deserved sinecure or well-earned trust that your health was as indestructible as your will. my mind wrestles with possible pictures: the victorian sensibility, the charcoal wool formality of your coats and vests, the trim of your beard as sharp as the crease of your collar—how would these du boisian essentials hold up to sub-saharan heat? would your critical faculties wilt in accra’s urban tropics as i’ve read that westerners’ are wont to do? dr. du bois, i presume you took the climate in stride, took to it, looked out your library’s louvered windows onto a land you needed neither to condemn nor conquer, and let the sun tell you what you already knew: this was not a port to pass on. your 95th birthday photo found you bathed in white cloth, cane still in hand, sharing a smile with a head of state who knew your worth—joy that this nation’s birth occurred in time for you to step out of a cold, cold storm into outstretched arms. would your pan- african dream have survived a dictatorial nkrumah, an nkrumah in exile? you took the prerogative of age and died without telling, without knowing. a half-century later, here in the country where you were born, i look into a screen and watch as, near and far, a pan- demic of violence and abuse staggers the planet. we seed the world with blood, grow bleeding, harvest death and the promise of more. when i turn bitter, seeing no potential for escape, i think of the outrages you saw—wars, lynchings, genocide, mccarthy, communism’s failure to rise above corrupting power any better than capitalism had, the civil rights movement’s endless struggle—and how you kept writing and walking, looking for what you knew was out there. your memory, your tireless radiant energy, calls me to my work, to my feet, insisting that somewhere on the earth, freedom is learning to walk, trying not to fall, and, somewhere, laboring to be born. Copyright © 2015 by Evie Shockley. Used with permission of the author. |
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